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John 3:16 [entries|friends|calendar]

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[25 Apr 2005|02:15pm]
[ mood | utterly blown away ]

... I'm in shock.

Solos I stole from Topher snagged:

- Loss
- Gee, Officer Krupke!
- Land of Make Believe


(P.S. Charley got the Simple Gifts and Appalachian Springs solos. Topher snagged Bolero, Everyone Loves the Blues, and the mad crazy solo in Malaguena, for which I am majorly jealous. And Holley got the horn solo in Land of Make Believe!)

88 saved -|- find the light

[20 Apr 2005|04:18pm]
[ mood | excited ]

Had to go down to the theater today to meet up with the rest of the cast, the rest of my section and to get my music.

This is so awesome. Oh my Gosh.

And I got to see Holley again. She looks really nice in red. And her shoes matched again!

This music is so good. I want some solos here. Those auditions are Friday afternoon. Hopefully I'll get at least one, but, we'll see.

This is so the best thing ever. I'm so excited about this whole thing. Wow.

25 saved -|- find the light

[17 Apr 2005|11:44am]
[ mood | amused ]

Gasp, my best friend and I are the same age again! (but I am still forever older than you)

skitts_scribble, come to my room at seven. For party-ness. And gifts! XD

find the light

[16 Apr 2005|09:09am]
OhmiGosh, auditions today. So so so so so so so so so nervous.

Oh yes. And it's Mush's birthday. Happy Birthday Mush!

... And now I make sure I really have this etude down after all.
49 saved -|- find the light

[12 Apr 2005|01:51pm]
[friends only: mush]

Mush, don't tell Holley I'm interested. I'm totally serious here, do not tell her that. For the love of Pete, please don't tell her.
57 saved -|- find the light

[07 Apr 2005|07:03pm]
[ mood | nervous ]

Um... Mush? You probably don't know, but I think I'll ask anyway: do you know anyone else who might be trying out for this? Because my anxiety wants to know if I really have a chance and maybe I'll know some of these kids and how good they are and what kind of standards are being set. Who knows?

Also, it might help me make friends with people at auditions (and rehearsals if I make it) if we have mutual friends. And you work at this theater a lot don't you?

13 saved -|- find the light

[21 Mar 2005|01:45pm]
[ mood | curious ]

Hey, Skitts, what are you doing on Sunday? 'Cause I was gonna drive back home and go to church with my family for Easter, and my mom volunteered me to help with the Egg Hunt for the little kids that afternoon, and I'd love if you came along. Mom said they can always use more helpers, especially for the really little kids that won't find anything otherwise.

So just let me know. It'll be fun. And if you like, you can stay for dinner too. Mom's making ham.

Anyway, I have an audition tomorrow, so I'm gonna go practice for that. Let me know.

2 saved -|- find the light

[16 Mar 2005|08:21pm]
[ mood | hopeful ]

Um... Skitts, I was wondering, mean, if you're not busy the rest of this week, do you want to hang out tomorrow or Friday or Saturday or, um, really anytime 'cause, uh, the only big homework we have this week is that essay on WWII and that'll be pretty easy for an essay, and um, you could help me with that anyway 'cause you know I'm a terrible writer, or I could help you with math 'cause you're terrible at math, or we could watch a movie, I got a bunch of old ones from my brother recently (Pet Sematary, The Last House on the Left, Cinderella (with Brandy), um, Monty Python and the Life of Brian (my brother would own that one), and Jerry Maguire) and my aunt recently sent me a Frank Sinatra DVD, and I haven't really watched it yet, but we could watch that. Or something. I don't know. Just if you're not already busy, let me know. I gotta go finish my math homework now. And practice a little, 'cause there's a solo I want and auditions are tomorrow. So call me or comment here or something.

29 saved -|- find the light

[15 Mar 2005|02:56pm]
[ mood | scared ]

[friends only: skittery]

Please, Skittery, I don't know, did I do something? If I did, I don't know what I did, but I'm really sorry, just please talk to me again, I don't have anyone else to turn to, even the band kids think I'm a snobby Jesus-freak and they're all jealous 'cause I finally got second chair but you don't even know that because you haven't been talking to me and you are all I have and I'm so lonely and hurt and confused and I'm almost ready to just go home and go to school at the public school 'cause I least I know kids there and have other friends there, and I mean, I don't want to throw away any future I might have in the finicky music business but right now I'd rather have someone just to talk to I'm going crazy, all I've got right now is God, my stereo, and maybe occasionally Blink or Teresa, but I can't really talk to Teresa right now, she said some things that scared and confused me and I want to talk to you about them but you're ignoring me or not paying attention to me or something and I don't know why and I'm sorry and I'm scared and just please, please, PLEASE don't ignore me anymore I'm so freaking lonely.

I walk alone, I walk alone...

28 saved -|- find the light

[15 Mar 2005|02:47pm]
[ mood | confused&hurt&lonely&depressed ]

I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Till then I walk alone

... Story of my life.
1 saved -|- find the light

[14 Mar 2005|07:12pm]
[ mood | upset ]

[friends only: skittery]

Skittery, I need you to help me and stop ignoring me for Mush. I know you have a boyfriend now, but I really need someone to talk to about something and you're all I have. I've been wanting to talk about this for a while now and you haven't seemed to notice anything. Skittery please.

find the light

[09 Mar 2005|04:18pm]
[ mood | confused ]


Girls confuse me.

... Intensely.


6 saved -|- find the light

[01 Mar 2005|08:32pm]
[ mood | confused ]

[friends only: skittery]

... Why would Teresa call me when she's having problems with Ivory?

I don't care really, and I even tried to tell her so, but she just kept talking, and then she finally started crying, and I can't say no to a crying girl so I listened but it was just like "... Um... you broke my heart and now you're here trying to make me feel sorry for you when yours is cracked?"

... Or maybe I'm talking to the wrong person about this? I don't know. I'm confused.

13 saved -|- find the light

[24 Feb 2005|03:26pm]
[ mood | weird ]

So I let Mush cut my hair last night. It's short now. And it's still kinda weird. My neck gets cold now. And my head feels lighter.

I guess I like it. It does make me look older. I kept surprising myself in class by running my hands through it to find out it wasn't there anymore.

The band director commented on it and said he liked it. He said I'll come off a little more dedicated-musician and less grungy-jazz-scum at auditions. And a bunch of the band girls liked it too. Like, everyone noticed, more than when Mush made me put all the products in my long hair.

And I don't understand why I still have to use the products. That really doesn't make sense. At all.

... The back of my neck feels weird.

35 saved -|- find the light

[23 Feb 2005|07:38pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]

[friends only: mush and skittery]

... So I talked to Teresa today.

It was totally on accident. The phone rang and I picked it up and there she was. And it wasn't even really talking, it was more her telling me things and me just nodding and going "Uh-huh. Yeah. Okay. If you say so. Yeah."

I mean... I heard what she said. "It wasn't supposed to be that way, Ivory was just mad because I was dating you, she shouldn't have told you that, I shouldn't have let her tell you that, I was going to be much nicer about it, I really was, I really liked you Noah, I really did."

I heard, but I'm not sure if I believe it.

She used to talk about my hair all the time. She just loved my hair. And I think I even know why.

... I think it's time for a haircut.

23 saved -|- find the light

[22 Feb 2005|08:21pm]
[friends only: skittery]

You're abandoning me.

You can deny it all you want, but you are. You're leaving me behind for Mush. All your big talk about how I treated you when I was with Emily is sheer hypocrisy. The way you two talk, you have no right to tell me I can't think that's how you're treating me because it is, and I'm tired of it. I'm tired of being left out.

Of just plain being left.

Tired, Skittery. Plain out tired
6 saved -|- find the light

[14 Feb 2005|06:13pm]
[ mood | crushed ]

I freaking-A hate everything.

I feel sick. Like, I want to throw up.

I seriously can't believe she'd do this to me. The phone can ring all it wants, but I'm not going to pick it up, 'cause I know it's her, and I know she says she's sorry, but I don't know if she is. This really hurts, and I don't think she knows how much.

I hate Valentine's Day. I was so looking forward to finally having a real date on Valentine's Day, but no. She had to ruin everything.

And that last "she" isn't Teresa. Freaking A.

I really liked Teresa too. What is it with me and girls? Why do I have such freaking bad luck with them? I thought Teresa would work, but I guess it was too good to be true.

... Damn. I give up trying to understand. I don't think I want to.

5 saved -|- find the light

[09 Feb 2005|04:42pm]
[ mood | worried ]

[private entry]

... I just called Teresa to see if we were doing anything on Valentine's Day. Apparently we are, but she was acting weird during the entire phone call. Like... distracted. Or something.

I don't know. She was probably tired or something. I haven't done anything to make her mad, at least not that I can think of. It's just... weird...

I hope this doesn't end badly. She's such a nice girl. And so pretty. And I really like her. I don't want to lose her.

Hopefully I won't have to.

find the light

[05 Feb 2005|12:28pm]
[ mood | hung over ]

... I think this is why I don't drink.


I don't know. I'm going to slap him. And shut the curtains. I thought it always rained in New Orleans, what's with the sun?! it hurts my head.

And so does Mush. Because he apparently doesn't get hangovers. And he's singing at the top of his lungs. And I'm ready to kill him.

But this computer screen hurts my head too. And Skittery's aunt is going to take us out to do stuff in a bit so I have to go get dressed. Or something.

Blink, call Teresa (her number's by the phone) and tell her I miss her. 'Cause I said I'd do it today but apparently I'm not going to have the time, listening to the itinerary.

Okay, leaving. And never drinking again in my life.

[EDIT] Also never taking a shower again in my life. I feel so VIOLATED.

4 saved -|- find the light

[31 Jan 2005|07:51pm]
[ mood | pensive ]

[friends only: skittery]

Skitts, I'm sorry I was a jerk earlier.

I tried to call my brother and talk to him about things, but my family apparently wasn't home. So I, um... I hope you don't mind, but I called Teresa. I didn't know how much to tell her without possibly upsetting you, so I kept a lot of things secret, because really, you don't know her, I barely know her, but I really didn't have anyone else to turn to.

She said I need to apologize. She said I should go to New Orleans. That I'm still not so sure about, and I told her why, and she says that she understands why I'm hesitant, but I should at least give it a shot. I'll think about it.

She also said to tell you that if you won't forgive me and let me be your best friend again, she's a total faghag and would love to take my spot.

I think I adore her.

But anyway. Yes. I am sorry. I shouldn't have compared what you're doing to what I was doing with Emily. That wasn't fair. I still do feel like you stood me up last night, but you apologized for that and I accept.

So. Um. Forgive me? Please?

find the light

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